All posts by Paul Goldberg

In Virginia, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Together

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On Friday, as planned I went to the rehab facility and worked with the therapists and nurses to get trained on what I need to do to help Carol continue to heal while we stay on the farm and then as we head for Rochester. 

I am no longer lonely, I am busy and I am loving it. My biggest job is helping her in and out of the “turtle shell” AKA Star Wars  Storm Trooper shell. AKA torture device designed to keep her back and neck rigidly aligned while they heal. I also am doing meal prep, she helps more and more each meal. We have been taking walks around the farm, further each outing.  Today she is complaining about being tired, we have taken several walks and she stood around watching while Dan and I spotted the hen house, she helped with meal prep too No wonder she is tired. 

Malena and Dan are super busy preparing to complete the move. The horses are in their new home and the chickens just arrived. There is enough in the house so they can eat and sleep, the rest will arrive as we make our planned departure on Wednesday. 

There are more pictures and a couple of video’s that I will make available when I am not falling asleep. This picture is looking North from the middle of one of the pastures. The motorhome can be seen just past the house.

 

In Virginia, Isolation, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Feeling or Events

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I’ll start with events. I drove the coach from Hungrytown Hollow Road to Simmons Gap Rd. An almost uneventful 40 miles until I cut the turn into the driveway short and dropped the right rear wheels into the ditch. The saving grace of it was a neighbor farmer who stopped by took a look and ran off to get blocks and such. An hour later we had lifted the wheels onto cinder blocks and I was able to drive the coach out of the ditch! I called the wrecker that charges $750/hour and suggested he head back home. A mighty thanks to Steve. It was beyond a random act of kindness and I have no idea how I will ever be able to pay it forward.

Carol is unhappy primarily because a woman who had been a sister to her before Alzheimer took her away, died. The loss is final. Also she learned today that she has to wear her turtle shell for two more weeks. I am still picking her up on Friday. I still plan to head to Rochester on the 7th. we will cope.

I have been feeling a bit lost these days. Although our sons have never let me feel alone, I miss having Carol by my side. I have so many online activities, from JCATs to our weekly zoom with classmates David and David and their spouses Toby and Terry. There is no way I should have time to feel lonely. TBK services for the holidays on YouTube were marvelous, but at the end of the services the screen went black. Where are all our friends we raised our families with sitting in the same seats year after year. Where is the opportunity to come down from the service with a bit of chit chat and catching up with people we haven’t seen in a year. During the service where was the rustle of pages and clothing and people sitting near me to remind me that I am not alone. Here I was actively davening (praying) standing alone in my motorhome or for one service with the delight of having my son Dan join me for the service, but IN MY MOTORHOME. I know all those attending experienced this in some way. It was far better than not attending, but for all the wonderful work the Rabbis and staff put into the preparation and delivery, and it was wonderful, it could not make up for the aloneness. 

Carol will be with me on Friday, with her brace, and we will neither of us be alone, or if we are it will be in the life we have chosen for ourselves together. A few days here in Virginia for Carol to get to see the new farm and then to the cozy comfort of our Rochester apartment for a while visiting at a distance with great friends and getting GeeWhiz restored to its roadworthy self. Then back across the country to our other community for the winter, and maybe a trip to Sicily, if such a thing can ever happen again.

In Virginia, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 9 Very Brief

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Carol is in Rehab and the PT and OT are working her hard. She is happy with the work and seems to be enjoying the progress. That is all about Carol.

Malena and Dan closed on their new farm “CHEVAL NOIR Farm” (Malena corrected the spelling, I got it wrong). They own two black French Canadian horses. Now they are in the throws of packing and discarding and I am mostly staying out of the way. Moving day is sometime next week. 

More when there is more and pictures to follow, when I take them.

In Virginia, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 8 – Waiting

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Since the last post not much has  happened other than healing, which is good. We have been told within the past hour that Carol will be moving to Rehab tomorrow, Thursday 24 September. 

Carol has been walking up and down the corridor several times a day with aids escorting her and sitting up for meals and to converse. The cervical collar and the brace continue to be uncomfortable , necessary annoyances. Some day . . . darn I had a wonderful cliche in mind, but I’ve lost it. 

In the midst of this, Malena and Dan are preparing to close on their new farm and to move in just after Yom Kippur. At some point I will be moving the coach to the new place in Dyke Virginia, about as far north of Charlottesville as Covesville is South. We scoped out the utilities and it should be easy to get set up, Dan is arranging for an electrician to install a 50 amp outlet near the coach. 

More when I have more to report.

opinion, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 7 Happy New Year

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The good news first. Carol is waiting, not to patiently, for a female bed to open at Encompass Rehab Hospital. The medical team has discharged her from all but basic care. The major healing we are waiting for is for the bones to heal sufficiently to free her from the brace and cervical collar. Less than two more weeks. 

Just because we are spending almost no time in the coach doesn’t mean it isn’t demanding attention. I seem to have eliminated the current scourge of mice. I really don’t care for the glue pads, but they work. I have had one gas strut that holds a cabinet door open break, had a spare and replaced it, a seal in the toilet has given up the ghost and drawer closing latches have continued fail. Almost all of this can be attributed to constant daily use for over 8 years. All of  it will be made right when I can devote extended time to it.

Rosh HaShana is approaching rapidly as I write. It will be multiply strange. Carol and I will not be together tonight. We are in Virginia not Rochester and I will be “attending” TBK by live broadcast on YouTube while sitting in my motorhome in Dan and Malena’s yard. I can only pray that the New Year 5781 brings more joy to our family and to the country and the world than 5780. 

I need to remember that this past year also brought much joy for Carol and me  mixed with the sadness. We traveled to Egypt, in September, Morocco, with family, and Ethiopia, with Joyce and Victor, with a stop in Israel in December and January. We drove across the country in the Fall to get to Jojoba Hills SKP Resort and as Covid was being denied we flew to Panama only to be evacuated after a week. We are not destined to complete a tour of Panama. 

Our plan for 5781 includes a drive across the country to Jojoba Hills as usual and a trip to Sicily in April, if we are healthy and the world is returning to good health. I guess that the trip has about a 50% chance of happening. As an alternative we will do more exploration of the United States since we cannot be stopped at state boarders, yet. The joy of RVing is that we can isolate while moving about the country.  

Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 6

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I am starting this blog with not much to report. Carol has been in ICU far to long given her relatively good condition. Since she went to Rehab and came back that once, they are watching her very closely to be sure it doesn’t happen again. 

It was a BIG DAY in one regard. Carol had her hair done the day she fell. She has been getting unhappy about the way it looks for the last two or three days. At her command I brought in the clippers I use for me along with some attachments for longer hair. The staff were willing to set her up with a smock – made out of an under pad – and I trimmed her hair. I do not have permission to share the pictures but she is very happy with the result. I have discovered a new talent 🙂

Next day, Monday, Carol is back in the Step Down Unit. Staff keep asking what she is doing back here, they care about her, but would rather she not need the level of care they provide here. It would appear she will be here for a couple of days. Then back to “the floor.” We are both trying to be patient. 

In other news I am still fighting the presence of at least one mouse in the motorhome. On my way home this afternoon I will stop and buy many mouse traps and special bait to try to put an end to this invasion before it becomes a family affair. I may try sticky traps as well, it’s WAR! It was eating my toilet paper!

 

 

Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 5 a Bump in the Road

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After two days in rehab Carol experienced difficulty breathing and was returned to the hospital where another chest tube was placed. It appears to be helping and her breathing seems to be much improved. We have no idea when she will return to rehab. 

My life has been a roller coaster. From visiting all day long to not being able to visit to visiting all day long. I have done very little else other than routine housekeeping and cleaning up after a couple of mice. Well there were at least two, both are gone. Dan and I will reset the traps and see how many more we can catch. I haven’t seen any recent sign if that means anything. 

We talked with Shelle Knutson today, her husband, Ron took a bad spill on a his motorcycle and about the same time Carol fell and has many of the same injuries as Carol .  They are members of Jojoba Hills. She cannot visit at all and 2 is hours away from his hospital. 

The above was written on Saturday, it is now Friday, things change. I went home last night expecting to hear about transfer back to rehab today or tomorrow. Instead there has been a set back and Carol is back in ICU under going an endoscopy. That is all I know as I write this.

I will post again when I have something to post.

 

In Virginia, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 4

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Great news! After 2 weeks less 4 hours, Carol is no longer a patient of UVA Medical acute care hospital. At 4 PM as promised this morning a transport crew arrived to move her to UVA Encompass Health Rehabilitation Hospital. I rode down the elevator with her on the transport gurney and kissed her goodbye as we parted at the first floor. I followed her over to the rehab and found as expected I was not able to see her or even get into the facility. This is hard on us, but the level of safety is reassuring. They even required that Carol have a covid test before they would accept her – negative of course. Now begins my wait for recovery with occasional visits as permitted by the facility. Carol has the hard work to do.

The only other news is not really mine to discuss in any detail. Malena and Dan are in the thralls of inspecting their new house, I get reports as appropriate. I hear about the horses. I am getting reports from Yechiel and Miriam on the West Coast as they update the bathrooms in their condo. 

My activity for the past two weeks has been mostly driving to and from the hospital and sitting with Carol. I haven’t the slightest idea what I will do with myself for the next couple of weeks. I do know the coach needs to be vacuumed and the floors washed and other maintenance that Carol keeps up with plus all my usual maintenance chores.

I am sure I will find ways to keep busy, even helping Dan and Malena prepare for the move and putting the house on the market. Or maybe I’ll join in a computer challenge that Dan has given our grandsons. 

 

Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 3

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Things are going more slowly than we could wish, but they are moving in the right direction. Carol moved from the “step down unit” to “the floor” in a semi private room a few days ago. Private rooms are apparently  being held for people who may be at higher contagion risk. She still needs to clear her lungs and get off the O2 feed and get her electrolytes in balance. I suspect the internal injury was greater than I was led to believe, or chose to hear. They are still pointing at a move to Rehab this week. There are no Covid 19 patients in the hospital  building where Carol is housed. UVA Health is fortunate to have an entire separate building for that care.

That is the short of it. I am being well cared for by Malena and Dan when I am not with Carol. Today I think we wore Carol out. I spent the morning in her room. Then Dan and Malena called to offer to take me out for lunch. After lunch Malena went up for a visit, I had made a special request to the Charge Nurse for permission to add a 3rd person to Carol’s list of visitors for ONE visit. Then Dan and Malena switched places while Malena and I went to see Alexander’s new apartment next to the UVA Grounds. Following that I spent the rest of the afternoon with Carol before returning to the coach to get some rest for me. 

The response from our family and friends across the country from our newer friends in Jojoba Hills SKP Resort, to our friends in Rochester who we have known for 50 years or more, to our friends we have met in all the corners of this country in our RV travels THANK YOU, THANK YOU  for your caring support. As I read the messages to her, Carol is overwhelmed with warm feeling. I keep telling her nobody expects her to write a personal note right away, but you know she is starting a list 🙂 

Please note Carol has not had the opportunity to edit or approve this post, I am on my own for this writing. 

 

 

 

none, Paul Goldberg Blog, Update on Carol

Progress Report 2

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We have been overwhelmed by the caring, loving response to Carol’s injuries. Neither she nor I will be able to respond individually accept our gratitude from the depths of our hearts for your love and well wishes. Note; the hospital has no volunteers moving about the floors to deliver flowers or even cards. As our Rving community knows there is no space whatsoever for flowers in the motorhome. Cards may be mailed to me at my son’s home, please email for the address, this is far to public  a place for that information. If you like you could send a gift in Carol’s honor to Rochester Philharmonic Orchestra (rpo.org) Temple B’rith Kodesh (tbk.org) or any other place of your choice. Or read a good book and pass it on!

Since my last post Carol has been moved from ICU to a “Step Down Unit” and just now we are told that she will be moving to a general medical unit as soon as a bed opens. Progress indeed. I’ll stop before I get into TMI.

We are looking into rehab facilities for post discharge. I fear that unlike the freedom I have had here to visit regularly, I will not be able to spend much time with her because of Covid 19 restrictions. 

I am struggling a bit with the limited time for visitation, once a week for an hour “socially” distanced and no contact, only two people . But as a great wit said, “it is what it is”. Maybe by the time she makes that move things will have lightened up some. For now we are marking time waiting for healing and a bed in the next  unit.